Just Say Yes

I’m sorry I haven’t written the past few weeks. I’ve been getting adjusted to going to college (more on that later) and having so many crazy and fun experiences that it’s been hard to sit down and write them down. That being said I'll try to write more and make this post entertaining. Here’s a few of the exciting things that have happened to me.

School: I’ve started school and have been getting used to the structure. The Indian school system is very different than the American one, so I am going to devote an entire post just to that. I'm just gonna say so far it's been a lot of fun and very little learning (which I don't mind one bit).

Making friends: I’m still a little overwhelmed by all of the new people at school who I’ve met, but I’ve started to make some great friends. Tamara and I go to school with 3 other girls who live by us and they’ve been super nice and interesting to talk to. We also officially have 6 Rotary inbounds (including me) going to school and more to come on the way! There are Audrey and I from the US, Tamara and Jesus from Mexico, and Gustav and Hugo from Sweden. The 6 of us have been having so, so, so much fun being foreigners together and they are some of the best people I’ve ever met and some of my best friends already.

Learning Marathi (and some general observations on language): I’ve slowly been working on learning Marathi, the language of the state of Maharashtra where Pune is, and the language that my host family speaks at home. Before I left for India I had a wonderful tutor named Shreshtha that helped me with the basics of Hindi. I got down the simple theory and some basic words, but it was a challenge. Hindi and Marathi are extremely different from any language I’ve ever experienced and it’s going to be difficult to get really good at speaking it. I’m really not able to decipher anything when people are speaking to each other, so it’s a major victory when I pick out a word or two. It usually goes something like: “They said Tum!! That means you! They’re saying ‘you...and something else.’”

Because of this I’ve been working on learning to read the characters. Since I am surrounded by them constantly this has been going much better. Whenever I am out on the two-wheeler or on the bus or in the car I try to translate everything that I see. Yesterday at the Police Station while in line I made a fool of myself by translating (with a lot of help from my host Mom) every sign in sight. Some of the letters I am very comfortable with, but the rest look the same. Its difficult because Marathi has 12 vowels and about 35 consonants. Each vowel can be added to a consonant for tons of combinations. There’s also a lot of nuance in the sound of the characters. I’m convinced there’s at least 4 different variations of Sh. There’s really 6 vowels, but 2 variations of each: one long and one short (I = e and ee). With the consonants there is similar confusion. My phrase book (thank you Mom and Dad!) gives prononciation for two different sounds as "ka" and "k'a". Apparently the latter has more emphasis. Even then though the "a" isn't really an "a" sound, but more of a "u" sound (making it kuh and kUH) and then vowels must be added to give it other sounds. Even with all of this difficulty I can see the progress I've made in the past month and I am becoming more motivated to really work hard at learning Marathi.

Even with the complexity of the language some parts of it are quite simple. Easily 1/3 of the words (mostly nouns) people say are in English because the languages have become so intertwined. My host dad was just explaining to me that no matter what order you put the words in in a given sentence the overall meaning doesn’t change. This takes away some of the stress with learning an entirely new language. And considering I am completely surrounded by it and so many people want to help me learn it I hopefully will become quite good at Marathi by the end of this stay. I have an added incentive since I’ve recently learned that the US State Department runs a program to help people learn difficult languages (mostly Asian ones like Mandarin, Japanese, Turkish, Arabic and...Hindi!). In part this is to encourage more people to learn these difficult languages, but another big reason is because they may be security threats to the United States someday. Not the best reason, but I'll take whatever opportunity to learn Hindi!

Audrey and I are definitely at a disadvantage because we don’t speak a language that no one else understands. Gustav and Hugo can speak in Swedish, and Tamara and Jesus (and Hugo) can speak in Spanish and have no one else know what they're saying. I have resorted to translating in the minimal Spanish that I know. They’ll say something and I’ll respond “Casa means house and queso means cheese!!!” and then smile proudly while they laugh at me. Who knows, maybe I’ll pick up a little Spanish (and Swedish?) this year. In order to cope with not being able to speak about things in a language no one else understands Audrey and I have resorted to saying nonsensical American landmarks to try and pretend no one can understand us. It goes something like this:

Audrey: “Montana Lake Superior Tennessee!”

Me: “I know!! Alabama Mount Rushmore…and Salt Lake City!!”

Then we laugh together and leave everyone else confused.

Being a foreigner: I have realized just how much I stick out on the Indian streets. At first I didn’t think that I was getting stared at too much, but as Audrey pointed out, I hadn’t been walking around on the streets much. Now that I'm out of the house more I've been noticing it a lot. And not just a lot of glances either. People staring at me (sometimes completely surprised) and not even stopping when I stare back. 

I had my big “Aha!” moment about how different I look around my 2^nd week here. While going somewhere on the motorbike I saw a white man walking on the side of the street. He looked maybe American or European, tall with light eyes, pink skin and blond hair. Back in Minnesota I wouldn't have looked twice at him. Instead though I stared in shock at him (which hopefully he didn’t notice). Not only did he really stand out on the street, but I realized that he was the first white person I’d randomly seen on the street. Then I realized that that must be what I look like to Indian people. Audrey describes it best: “like a giant blob of sunshine”. This may apply to her more as she is blonde, slightly fairer than I and tall by Indian standards, but it’s not far from how I look. Especially when the 6 exchange students are in a group we really, really stand out. It’s made all of us automatic friends with any other foreigners. Two days ago at school I went up to 2 girls who obviously weren't Indian and asked them where they are from and they ended up being fellow Rotary inbounds from Rotary! I think I scared them by how excited I was to meet them, but I'm just happy that more people are arriving!

Looking really different has its benefits and its drawbacks. In school I’ve had people strike up a conversation with me just because they can tell I’m an exchange student. In these instances I don’t mind obviously not being Indian. However at times it can be really frustrating. When I’m walking to the store with my host brother or sitting in the canteen sometimes I would just like to be anonymous. However I know I can’t change how I look. Even when I completely cover my face except for my eyes (the style for women when riding 2 wheelers) it is still evident that I’m not Indian. As I’ve gotten more comfortable here I’d really like to blend in a little more. When I'm walking down the street I can tell that every single person looks at me, and most don't look away. The novelty of this attention has passed and it's getting annoying and sometimes kind of creepy. I may wear some Indian clothes (Kurtis mostly), but I can't change the fact that I have brown hair, green eyes and white skin. It can be really frustrating because no matter how comfortable I get with living in India I will always look different. It's a hard reality to accept (and I still haven't completely) but I'm going to try and learn some sassy phrases in Marathi to say to people who stare too much.

Going to a pooja: Earlier this week I went to a Pooja. Although it can be celebrated for different reasons this one was because someone Rashmi knows just got married. It's basically an offereing to the gods and involves eating and socializing and playing games. I didn’t have any idea what to expect and as I wasn’t feeling my best I tagged along slightly reluctantly with my host mother. Going was one of my best decisions so far. The games turned out mostly dancing and a lot of singing and they were so fun to watch. They were actually really fast and complicated and my host Mom told me they were really good exercise. All the women were wearing the most beautiful saris and so much gold jewelry. Overall it was just entertaining and exciting to watch.

There were 2 girls my age there and one of them, Suyoga, invited me to try one of the games. I was more than a little terrified and embarrassed to be up in the middle in front of everyone, but I agreed to try it. It turned out she didn’t know how to do it either and so we had fun bumbling through the steps together. Afterwards I talked to them and it turned out the other girl, Pratiksha, goes to Symbiosis (my school) but to the School of Photography. They two of them volunteer with an organization that hosts Americans who are in Pune for a few months. They show them around the city and have fun getting to know them. Suyoga and Pratiksha offered to show me different sights and once the Americans get here in a few weeks to have me come hang out with them. In the end I had more fun than I thought possible, got to see a new side of Indian culture, met some amazing new friends and will get to show some fellow Americans the city I am growing to love soon!

Happy Raksha Bandhan: This past Tuesday I celebrated Raksha Bandhan, or “Brother Sister Day”. On this day girls tie a bracelet (or Rakhi) on the wrist of their brother (or cousin or good friend) and in return get some kind of present. Tamara and Audrey came over to my house on this day to give bracelets to Sahil, who at some point this year will be their host brother. I also got to meet the sisters of my host Father, Sameer, and their families. It was also a fun day since we didn’t have school and I now have an Indian brother!

A revelation: Two days ago I was in a rickshaw on my way home from playing laser tag and pool with some other Rotary Inbounds and kids from my class when I had a revelation. My thought process went something like this: “First, I’m in India. A country halfway around the world that is incredibly different than the United States. Second, I have successfully communicated with a rickshaw driver (not the kindest of people) about where I wanted to go and haggled for a reasonable rate. Third, I know my way around the streets near my house and I feel comfortable with where I am and if need be I could walk home. If I can do all of these things…then what can’t I do??” It was such an amazing feeling of confidence and happiness and excitement that I smiled stupidly to myself the rest of the way to my house.

Before I left everyone said stuff like, “This year will transform you!” and “You’re going to learn so much!” I always agreed politely, but I didn’t really think about it until now, when I am actually feeling the effects that 3 and a half weeks in India have had on me. Although I have a giant support system with the Rotary and my friends and family, I really am on my own this year. While all of these people will help me figure things out, only I can embrace this amazing opportunity and learn from it. Only I (and I suppose Audrey too) are being ambassadors for our communities and all of the United States. This is exciting, but also a little scary that so many people have placed their trust in me and believe that I can make this year a learning experience for myself and others.

This (almost) first month has taught me so many things. I probably don't even recognize everything that I have gotten out of it. My biggest take away has been to trust myself and my instincts, to try new things and push myself, to say yes to every new food or opportunity and most of all: to believe in myself. As cheesy as all of that is, it's the best way to sum up how amazing only the beginning of this incredible journey has been.